TO THINK LIKE A MAN, YOU MUST KNOW THE MAN. (DO YOUR BIT TO PROTECT YOURSELF FROM RAPE).

By ; Joseph Adamu Keman

One of the most outstanding books I have read about relationship and intimacy was written by the great Steve Harvey. It is called “Act Like a Lady; Think Like a Man”. I have watched the movie, you probably have to, but I am not talking about the movie. I am talking about the BOOK.
You see, in this book, Mr. Harvey made some profound points about the man’s personality, the pattern of his thinking and what he thinks of as a fulfilled life, especially in relation to the woman. I have often recommended the book to ladies, because I believe it unveils a lot about the man; it gives a deep understanding to the lady who wishes to forge a great and purposeful relationship.
Among the key points about the man, Harvey states that men evaluate themselves by WHAT THEY DO for a living, WHAT THEY EARN from what they do, how well they can PROVIDE FOR THE WOMAN they love, and how much they can PROTECT THE WOMAN they love.
But most profoundly, MEN ARE SEXUAL BEINGS.
According to Mr. Harvey, it is a basic impulse for a man to want to have sex with a lady when he sees the one that appeals to him. A man may come across as just a friend, a philanthropist, a good Samaritan, but if he is to have his way, he would want to HAVE SEX with her. I dare to say that no one knows this fact better than the men themselves who probably have used the guise of a friend, a good Samaritan, etc to have their way with ladies from time to time; perhaps that is why most men would tell you that they are not comfortable with other men hanging around their lovers in the name of friends.
I believe one of the first errors that women make is the assumption that when it comes to the man, they are clever and powerful enough to handle whatever situation that may arise. A better and more articulate word for this is COMPLACENCY!
Do not get me wrong, I believe women are quite powerful. They are God’s masterpiece. I have always wondered how they can achieve so much when they have such great responsibility placed on their shoulder either by nature or by society. But the truth is, when there is a man in the equation, then the power of the woman becomes subtle than brute, and it must be used with utmost discretion, even though the end result will be quite visible for all.
With the spate of rape incidents making waves right now, complacency is a luxury no woman should afford. The sexual nature of man aforementioned necessitates this claim.
We know that there are many born again and gentlemen out there: pastors, imams, public figures, counselors, mentors, and the list goes on and on. Note however, that the public image of men does not neutralize their basic nature. So do not deceive yourself by saying “Haba! He is my mentor ooo, nothing can happen”. Please I beg you, do not put yourself and the man in the way of temptation. Even pastors will tell you, do not be spiritual in a situation where you are supposed to exercise wisdom and act physically. The Bible tells us to abstain from evil and stay aloof of it in whatever form or kind it is (1Thess. 5:22).
I personally believe that the very day that women equip themselves with the right knowledge and start thinking rightly towards men, that is the day that the fight against rape will start yielding positive results. One of the ways to think rightly is to tell yourself that you are not strong enough to defend yourself physically against a man.
I am not placing the entire responsibility on the woman. I just am advising ladies against complacency. The statistics of rape incidents is alarming! How can anyone explain the rape of a minor? How can anyone explain the rape of a trustee by the trusted? How can anyone explain the rape of a lady and her subsequent murder IN CHURCH? The point is, we have lost our core values; if our grandparents were to appear and witness the decadence of this generation, their hearts will be shattered to pieces!
The society is degenerating! Moral societal norms are growing worse by the day! With these undesired development, it is not enough to just “SAY NO TO RAPE”. In fact, I believe even the rapists will post “say no to rape”, and continue to lie in wait for their next victim.
So, ladies, do not think a man is too close to you to rape you! Not all men have been able to master their emotions, and their sexual debauches. Some only exercise restraint because of the presence of the public. In private, he may just devour you! Do not put yourself in a compromising situation of vulnerability such as is referred to as privacy.
Rape is not about what the woman is wearing or not wearing. It is not about how she speaks or how she moves. IT IS ABOUT A BEAST IN HUMAN SKIN WHO CANNOT TAME HIS SEXUAL URGE, and who believes every woman is his for the taking whether she consents or not!
I do not always advocate for the capital punishment, but let us face it; there are people we are better off without in this world. I do not get to decide who lives freely and who gets what punishment for what crime, but when I am listing the great evils of this world such as terrorism, racism, enslavement, etc I will be sure to include rape in the list.
While this write up is motivated by the unfortunate series of rape incidents of recent, it is not in any way an effort to blame any victim of rape. It is simply a clarion call to vigilance. Many rapists were uncles, mentors, friends, and “confidants”.
Always remember to ACT LIKE A LADY, BUT THINK LIKE A MAN.
I would recommend that book to ladies any day and any time.